Finding Your Tribe

I know every mile will be worth my while. I would go most anywhere to find where I belong.

Michael Bolton, Disney’s Hercules

High school can be bad if you get caught up in the cliques. These little groups focus not on who they can include, but who they can exclude. They become insular to the point of being antagonistic and even hateful of those who “are out”. It’s a blessing to be able to ignore and avoid groups like that.

Humans are social creatures. We join together as groups when faced with adversity and divide ourselves into groups when we have the chance to create the adversity. We choose to bond with others, and can fight like hell to protect those bonds when challenged. Those we are bonded with the closest we consider family, but every group we bond with becomes a tribe.

Some tribes can be bonded over politics, some over religious views, some over the kind of dog we like best. We can bond over the silliest reasons, or just because we were at the same point in our lives at the same time. We choose what tribes to belong to, but we also need to realize when we are in a tribe we no longer belong in.

Everyone belongs somewhere, and it’s not always where you are right now.

If there is something you want to pursue as a career, you should find people that want to do similar things and choose to bond with them. The support and kinship you find in the bonds you create makes you into a tribe. They will help you to not be discouraged, and to keep you from feeling alone. It takes a ridiculously strong person to face adversity alone, and no one can face it on their own forever.

There are always ways to connect to people that share your interests, your drives, your passions and it is easier than ever to look for them. Look into social media sites such as Facebook, Discord, online forums, and specialty websites that fit your focus. Be willing to be vulnerable and show the fruits of your interests to others. The right ones will appreciate and welcome you.

Search for people that you can trust to connect with you that you can each add to each other’s lives. You will meet good people. You will meet bad people. Do not discount the good because of the bad, and do not ignore the bad for the good.

Be picky. Your tribe is out there.

See you next Wednesday.

Chris Jabas